So... I may have watched the movie Sabrina 3 times in the last 2 weeks. You know the one with Harrison Ford from about 1993? The story of the little British chauffeur’s daughter who goes to Paris to grow up and then finds herself falling for the very wealthy brothers she has watched her entire life?
The reason why I bring this up is not just for public shame, although I know that is possible.
I’ve picked up this habit of watching a lot of movies as of late. It’s not just a matter of really liking chick flicks, although I really do. And I’ll admit it. Honestly, I always work with something going on in the background – the tv, music, a movie, or as of late some really funny coworkers who crack me up at least when I’m in the office. With the rather large document I just finished this was very necessary and then the large numbers of e-mail messages that accumulated while I was gone it was yet again a necessity.
Before I could catch up on sleep I had this epiphany. It was a sleep deprived epiphany, but I think a legitimate one despite the state of my emotional well being.
The accusation – I believe that when I do finally snag a nice man of my very own it will be like in the movie Sabrina. No, I’m not living out some chick flick fairy tale in my head, promise. But really… It will happen a lot less like the chick flicks when you’re swept off your feet or overwhelmed with emotion and a whole lot more like a hostile or non-hostile business take over. This is harsh, I know. But really I think it may be accurate.
Let’s look at recent history: Of the last 3 guys that I have gone on more than 1 date with... 2/3 started under the auspices of a business meeting that really were dates. The other one was dead in the water before we started so we'll call him an outlier. Each of the 2 thought it was necessary to ask me to dinner to "discuss work" to get me on a date (don’t worry… they have both individually confirmed this with me later on in our friendships).
I know that I need to lighten up and I need to step away from work for the sake of my future socialization, but 1 - I don't entirely know how and 2 - all aspects of my life require me to work. At church, I'm in charge of all activities. At work, I'm in charge of everything political. With social organizations, I'm in charge of the chapter. With my personal life... well... there isn't much time for just socialization, but when there is it ends up being me running on high efficiency to keep up with as many people as possible. This is not conducive to low-key socializing or just getting to know people. Socializing is not rated based on efficiency… unfortunately.
Bringing this back to the movie – Sabrina had loved the showboat Larrabee brother her entire life – the one who woos women for every day of the week and poses in Gap ads. She eventually ends up with the other Larrabee brother – the businessman who treats their relationship like a business acquisition until he becomes emotionally attached and the family sends him on a plane to Paris to chase her. He didn’t realize he loved her. He was cold and heartless until he understood this fact.
As sad as it is… I really like Linas. I can relate to Linas. The part that worries me isn’t that I could snag a nerd like him… in fact I really like that idea… but what is more frightening than that is that I might snag a flighty, whimsical guy like Sabrina. Forget the gender issues there and go with it. I have my moments when I am Linas although I don’t think I’ve fallen quite into that deep of a rut quite yet. I know I must launch my way out of this callous rut or potentially suffer in this loveless state forever.
Don’t worry… I’m not trying to make this dramatic… but I am a realist and I know that my current social patterns do not lead to marriage or love. I’m working on fixing that.
So to you, Linas (the character, not the actor Harrison Ford), I get you. I love who you are and I respect you. If you happen to be a single, 20 or 30 something man and LDS… call me… I think we could have something beautiful.
To you, the man who better resembles the wandering Sabrina… maybe we could have a summer (or really any season) fling to break me of my workaholic ways. You should know now that it won’t last – I just don’t understand or respect flighty or lost… but I think I could learn a thing or two from you.
3 comments:
Hey Marissa - great blog. I'm sure there is somebody who is just the right combination of flighty/lost and responsible that can make you really happy. My bro is kind of stuck in the same workaholic syndrome that you described, except he's more of a novel writing-a-holic. It's great he just finished his second novel, but it's also important to just chill and date. But, just my $.02, I think that "chilling" the "conventional" way for people who are not relaxed at chilling (which would totally include me as well) is somewhat counter-productive, cuz the people who you would hope to attract whilst "chilling" will sense the nerves from a mile away. So I guess what I'm saying is that I think my brother has a great approach: "chill" (his definition of chill is atypical, I'd say) with the people who are similar to him. Ha, I'll let you know how successful he is at it, though! :) But basically, I don't think you need to stress. You're a great person with lots and LOTS of talents and you will find someone.
Great. Great. Wonderfully written, brilliantly thought out, fantastically executed.
You both are sweet. I'm certain I'll snag a nice man someday and I really feel pretty good about that. I just think it'll be an interesting adventure to get there. Hope you both are doing so well! Kate - I hear you are expecting baby #2 and Carolyn - congrats on the new car!
Post a Comment